Reflection Post

I think this project felt sort of like a catastrophe at points. I really had no story spine or greater goal. I didn't really know what I was doing or what the overall purpose of my story was. But I think this was a great thing for me from a creative and personal standpoint.

While the lack of these things made my life difficult in post production with editing, it really let me be free to explore exactly what I was looking for during the production process, which I appreciated. Mainly because I had no idea what I was looking for.

I knew I wanted something.having to do with movies. What I really wanted was to validate my desire to make movies with some existential higher power that is unique to movies and justify me doing them over other things. What I came up with in the end was that there really was no higher purpose of movies that transcends all of life. which is kind of sad but kind of okay.

If I had had a set structure with this project and an idea of exactly what I wanted to get out of my conversations with people, I never would have come to this realization. Because I went into this area so blind, I think I grew as a person more than I would have otherwise. Which I feel like is the greatest accomplishment I could have hoped for.

While I learned most of these lessons from production, when I went into editing and at the very end I hated my project. It seemed pretentious and pointless. like it meant nothing. Like I hadn't managed to glean out the wonder of all of it in quick soundbites pieced together. I was surprised how many people enjoyed it and disagreed with me afterwards though. Perhaps I had seen the footage too much for me to hold an unbiased opinion. I unfortunately had to do a lot of editing last minute, so it was hard for me to take a step back and look at it later.

Overall, this project let me reflect a lot on how I viewed movies in ways that I now consider correct or incorrect and also let me refine my documentary skills.